[kallagreen]

I've never been a neat freak of a person but I do like things put away and tidy. But after having kids (and having three dogs... I didn't "have" the dogs) I can't seem to get my house clean. I always make up a list of things to do on this day blah blah blah... and those days come and go. Life happens and I go to bed an night getting nothing done.

I am sure most of you can relate to the exhaustion of having to raise children and I guess sometimes that means other things go untended. I will love to be able to hire someone to clean my house but there is no money in the budget to do it. So there for I am my own cleaning lady which absolutly SUCKS! Right now its to the point where I need a group of people to come in and throw everything away.

Over the past couple weeks I have somewhere been able to pull some energy from my a$$ to get somethings done. I have done a pretty good job of keeping the dishes done every night and the counters clean. (I do a pretty good job with the table but the mail loves to pile up on the table.) I also have also decided that I needed to get my butt in gear so I have "hired" my husbands cousin (she's 11) to watch my son (more like play) while I can clean a room in the house. My daughter is sleeping at that time so I figured that was a good time for me to get some stuff done. Yesterday was the first day we did this and it was great. My goal was to get the bathroom clean and I got that done and the kids laundry and put away (which normally sits in the baskets because I never get time to put it together.)


I guess I say all that to ask all you lovely people put there...

Am I the only one that has a messy house? And how do you keep your house clean?

[Couponclipper003]

I am in the same boat!!! I have always been a neat freak...but with two kids... laundry baskets of clean clothes are stacked because I don't have time to put them away. I am good at 'basic' cleaning (table, counters, dishes, laundry) but can't get the house organized the way I want. By the time the kids go to bed at night...I am exhausted!

[Dominochic]

Oh man - that is SO me!! And I only have 1 daughter and no dogs! Haha!

My mother-in-law gave me some cards (I think this was a hint...*how embarrassing*) There is a card for each day of the week.
Monday: Grocery shopping, take out the trash, do dishes, straighten up
Tuesday: Laundry, do dishes, straighten up
Wednesday: Bathroom, do dishes, straighten up
Thursday: Kitchen, do dishes, straighten up
Friday: Bedroom, do dishes, straighten up
Etc.... (There's more on the cards...that was the short version) It's helped me. I don't always stick to it, and lately I've been slacking, but it helps me to keep my days organized and not get overwhelmed.

[carmended]

ME TOO ME TOO ME TOO!! oh my gosh, i never have the energy or will to start cleaning, I wish that i could just get a bulldozer and go through each room. I don't know what to do either!!

[carissadenn]

I feel the same way! I have a 2yr old and a 5yr old (both boys)...2 cats and a dog. No matter how much I clean, it never is "done". I will finish cleaning the living room, move on to the kitchen...only to find 5 minutes later the living room is already messy!
My main problem is we live in too small of a space for the amount of people/ animals we have. That and there is NO storage space. My "linen closet" is the top of my dryer.
Needless to say clutter is a big frustration of mine.

[Momma D]

This is exactly how I am feeling. I actually clean a friends house for extra money. She is single, but works full time and hates to clean. Her house actually stays pretty clean from week to week. NOT MINE!

I can clean in the morning and it be a total wreck a few hours later. We just bought our house about a year ago and it just doesn't seem to stay clean. I can't keep the wood floors clean, I don't want to be a freak with my kids about not playing or always being "neat".

Thanks for sharing your frustration kallagreen! at least I know that I am not alone.

I think it's worse when you are a sahm, the kids are home all day. When I worked I would clean before bed, then off to work in the morn, and in the afternoon, the house would still be clean. Now it never seems to stay clean.

[countrygal7906]

I have no kids and it's just me during the week and I still have that problem. You think what can one person really do. LOL You should see my house on Friday morning. I'm rushing all day Friday to get it all clean b-4 hubby comes home for the weekend. Just can't make my self clean to much during the week.

[mandarn]

I am in the same boat too. I have a 10 month old and he won't let me get anything done. He crawls all over the place and is in to everything. When he naps I usually have time to do the dishes and some laundry. His second nap is usually when I shower. So frustrating. Too much clutter!!!

[xoxo4debbie]

a clean house is no place to raise kids hahaha!

[doubleblssd]

Same here. Use to be overly obsessive about cleaning. My house stayed perfect. But now I have two kids and I work full time outside of the house. And to add insult to injury it has gotten worse since I started couponing! I have piles of paper everywhere, I brought a table in from the garage to coupon on and my stockpile is all over.

[jldood]

Even if you can get it clean, it gets messed up in no time at all. It is kind of like Thanksgiving dinner, you slave all day and it is done in 10 minutes. That is how long a clean house lasts around here. Just yesterday I did the full on clean downstairs, I mean nitty gritty on my hands and knees, and within 20 minutes my youngest managed to somehow tear apart a stuffed animal that was full of stryofoam balls. Can you say all over, I almost died I swore I was never cleaning again, that it could sit there, I swept it up later.

I find it very difficult to get my stuff done around the house now that my kids are home from school. I used to have a set day to do it, now that is all out the window. Oh well, I guess it will get cleaned at the end of August when they go back to school .

[knw2860]

I am in the same boat!! I have three boys ages 11, 8, and 4. My 8 year old is disabled so he cannot be left alone and dh works 12 hour shifts. My 11 year old is very good about helping me watch the other two so I can get some stuff done but I swear I clean a room and move to the next one and when I go back to the first one it is dirty again.

I recently told a friend that I feel like my life is a hair washing episode but instead of wash rinse repeat it is dirty clean repeat.

[karenvallone]

Honey my babies are 20 and 22 and my house is still never the way I want it. They came home from college and clean went out the door. No matter, the dust and clutter will be there tomorrow. Don't get caught up in it, those babies will be grown in the blink of an eye.Enjoy them and do what you can when you can. It almost seems as if I was more organized when they were babies than I am now! i guess I had to be. I thought once they were grown my house would always be pristine...Forget that. i always have a housefull of kids but I dont mind, I love that their friends like to be here. Don't seat the small stuff, it will get done, just enjoy those babies while you can!!!!

[alexia598]

I had things under control when I was working and had one kid. I had thing under control when the twins still napped. Now -- it's a lost cause. I'm sad about it, but that's not enought to motivate me. I've read books (flylady, sidetracked home executives) -- good reads, but not enough to get me going.

To top it off, I have landfillophobia -- the guilt about where garbage goes.

[shnn18]

I'm like you. I'm not a neat freak, but I do like to have things picked up. It is a constant battle. Every night I go to bed and say I will get the house and laundry done tomorrow and like you "life happens" and at the end of the day it is not done. I just remind myself that some people are not fortunate to have children or have lost their children and they would give anything for my messy house just to hear the laughter of children and it makes me appreciate the mess a whole lot more. One day when they are older and moved out, my house will stay clean and I will give anything for it to be a mess.

[Helena68]

My babies are 18 and 20 and are worse than when they were actually babies...I often say to Dh That with 4 adults in the house things should be peachy keen but that's just not so...Mydd is a total slob and her bedroom and bathroom are atrocious...When they were little it was so much easier to get them to cooperate. My dd guilts me by saying I just worked a 10 hr. day can you give me a break..We pay for everything they collect a paycheck and live high off the hog...I would like to get a break once in a while Ds keeps his stuff up but eats us out of house and home. Sorry for the rant, I am too always tired and work hard to keep my home nice but would like to have help from these adult kids of mine. My husband often gets tough with the kids and then I feel bad and tell him not to be so mean its a conundrum...I need to toughen up...If they don't start contributing to the household I may charge them so I can hire a housekeeper...hey that sounds like a plan...ha

[alexia598]

Helena68, if you don't mind my asking... what would you have done differently with your kids in raising them to be responsible for their messes? There's still a chance for us with younger kids to get their/our act together... I hope...

And, also, if you don't mind my 2 cents... I think you SHOULD charge them for a housekeeper. That's a great idea!

[rebekah]

My kids are 2 & 3 and I keep the kids confined in 1 room-usually DS's room while I clean. His lock is on the outside of his door (due to him leaving his room during nap/night time.) So I lock the kids in the room and clean...checking on them every 5 minutes or so. They then know they have to clean up their mess before they can leave the room...by this time they are so ready to get out of his room that they clean it up very quickly. When the cleaning is done, we leave the house...run errands or play outside until nap time. Also, meals/snacks are usually eaten outside on their picnic table to reduce crumbs.

[jwieland]

OMG this is SOOOO my house and me. Every day I try to plan what I am going to clean and everyday it seems to fall by the wayside. When I do clean it lasts for all of an hour, maybe, if we are having a really good day. My oldest DS is always leaving his lacrosse gear lying about (and let me tell you if you don't know lacrosse gear is huge!) and my 5 yr old DS is autistic and fixated on Thomas the Tank Engine. You can't walk through half the rooms in the house without tripping over train tracks he has built and trains. I try, I really do but then when I do clean and it goes to crap within minutes I feel like why even bother. I mean I seem to be the only one who cares and all I get is frustration and aggravation. I am not a neat freak by any stretch of the imagination but I would like the place to at least be presentable if we have someone come over. I mean is that really asking that much? We live by a lot of people with money and my oldest DS does not believe he should have to clean because none of his friends do. Well, believe me if I could afford to hire help I would but that is just not an option. Then with the new baby my time and energy are even less. Oh, and did I mention that we are just finishing having the kitchen and laundry room repaired because of water damage from a pipe bursting in the wall? For months I had nothing but a concrete slab as my floor and boxes of stuff piled up here and there while everything was torn apart. Lately I have just been throwing things away. I have been trying to look at things and if nobody has used it in six months to a year I junk it or donate it. Now my dryer is broken so I can't do laundry without having to make a trip to the laundromat to dry the cloths which just drains more of my time. I swear it never ends.

[brook6]

every Mom faces this at some point...

check out FLYlady...
FlyLady.net: Your personal online coach to help you gain control of your house and home

[karenvallone]

Originally Posted by Helena68

My babies are 18 and 20 and are worse than when they were actually babies...I often say to Dh That with 4 adults in the house things should be peachy keen but that's just not so...Mydd is a total slob and her bedroom and bathroom are atrocious...When they were little it was so much easier to get them to cooperate. My dd guilts me by saying I just worked a 10 hr. day can you give me a break..We pay for everything they collect a paycheck and live high off the hog

Helena,,,I so feel you on this one. I feel like I could have written this. I had more control when they were younger. I come home from a long day at work and it looks like a cyclone went thru my house. Everyone goes in different directions as we are all working so its really hard to pin them down sometimes to take responsibility for things. I started leaving big sticky notes on the microwave in the morning before I leave for work. they know when I leave notes that I am at the end of my rope and you better get your crap together. Its sad tho because i always taught my kids that part of responsibility is doing something without being told to do it. You should know what needs done without me telling you to do it. Somewhere along the way the message got lost in translation!!!!!! But I love the part about telling them that you may charge them so that you can hire a cleaning person. (I cant beleive that never occurred to me) . Maybe I can give them an itemized statement for cooking, cleaning, laundry and even my afc time as most of what I do is to get them what they like(ie body wash, shaving cream, razors). i am seriously considering this LOL I let you know how it turns out after I load the dishwasher, fold the laundry and make a run to walmart.

[LaLax2]

wow i thought i was the only one i feel like the more i clean the more messy it gets

[anewbern88]

I rant and rave about this all of the time. I fell like I spend all day cleaning, in between taking care of a 3 year old and a 3 month old. It is so stressful because I feel like that is all I do. At the end of the day it doesn't look like I did anything. Every other day I say:" I don't know why I do anything around her, I am just going to stop cleaning because it doesn't do any good" I can't stand a dirty house though, it just irritates me, So I give in rather quickly. Oh well, that's the story of our lives ladies!!

"cleaningthe house while the kids are still growing is like shoveling the sidewalk while it's still snowing"

[jbarber8]

I used to have a very clean house before kids too. Now I keep up with laundry, dishes, and picking up toys... that's about it.

We went through a really bad stage around age 1 with each child that I call "Dump and go" -- the kids dump a cabinet, a drawer, whatever, and move on to the next one! I follow behind them picking up, picking up, picking up. I don't know about girls, but little boys are very go-go-go. It takes lots of energy to pick up after them.

I can't stand dirt on the floors (sand) so that is the first thing I clean if the laundry and dishes are cleaned up. Things like the bathrooms and dusting tend to go longer since it's my least favorite. My DH will help, but not until I ask and not without grumbling! He's like me and prefers doing dishes & laundry to actual cleaning. I do the best I can ... then right before my MIL comes for a visit I hire a cleaning lady. I do it about 3X a year and it gets me caught up... then we start all over again.

Maybe you and DH could agree to get that for each other in lieu of Bday, Christmas, etc. or ask your parents to do that for you? For me... so worth it to have the house feeling clean (every room clean at the same time!) once in awhile is priceless.

[jbarber8]

BTW my kids are 2 and 4 and they help. They get stickers, computer time or TV time if they help. It's little stuff like putting their own laundry in the washer, set the table, clear their plates, feed the cat.

When I was young, I had to do my own laundry since the time I could reach the controls. If I didn't wash it, I would run out of clothes! Later I had to do cleaning chores for my $3-$5 allowance. I hated it, I had to be nagged, but my parents had 4 of us and they didn't do any cleaning from the time I was 10 until we all moved out. I guess their job changed to being management of their cleaning crew.

I'm planning to do the same with my little guys. When they are older, they'll help around the house and mow the lawn... and if they're working full time and want to hire it done, that's their option!

I know it sounds mean, but we're raising 2 responsible adults here. I'm doing their future wives a favor. Think about this: our next door neighbor has 3 adult children living with them. Only one works, none in school, and none lifts a finger or contributes financially. Every time I see her son, he's sleeping on the couch. She works 2 jobs to support them, and when she's home, she does their laundry and cooks for them and cleans, and their lawn is mowed by a professional - which she affords because of the 2 jobs (she has a DH too and he works but spends all free time gaming on his computer). I think she's absolutely crazy! "But they'll be gone one day and then I'll miss them! I appreciate being able to do their laundry now." Can't Johnnie mow the lawn? "Well, Johnnie doesn't drink or do drugs. He's a good boy so I don't have any problems with him sitting on the sofa."

Whatever! To each his own, I guess. Why would anyone leave a great freeloading situation like that? She has raised 3 No-Mo's. (No motivation.)