[AshburnMom]

Yea, I can imagine the thrill of anticipation can be double-sided after 4 or 5 years! Even the anticipation of good things can wear on you after that long! Hope it's not for much longer!

[cddwil]

no advice on my end to you except i will say a short prayer you and your family!

[icollectcokestuff]

Thanks...we do have some restrictions in place. Our point of view is that it is easier on the child to be with a family of the same ethnic group. Also we are restricted with some medical conditions since I am allergic to latex and cannot be around a lot of medical equipment.

[owutaqt]

Originally Posted by icollectcokestuff

Thanks...we do have some restrictions in place. Our point of view is that it is easier on the child to be with a family of the same ethnic group. Also we are restricted with some medical conditions since I am allergic to latex and cannot be around a lot of medical equipment.

I have resisted this thread for awhile, as my husband and I had such a horrible time with this. We did adopt a girl two yrs ago after fostering her for almost four years, but it was so hard on all of us.

Try to not worry too much on the ethnic group of a child, our daughter is latino we are caucasian, never been an issue. Open your home to sibling groups that might include a girl, this can make placement easier.

Whatever you do please please please be careful with social workers, NEVER tell them anything that they do not need to know. Trust me I could write a book on the things that I did wrong but that was the one key thing that I wish I would have remembered. They will act like you are all on the same team, but trust me if they think even the slightest thing is off it will cause a lot of problems.

We were actually written up for child abuse because our foster daughter tried to throw a tv at me after she broke the window in her room, I placed the tv out the window to keep it away from her. We were told that we did not handle it right and that we should have taken the TV and sat on it to keep her safe.

It can be crazy, but it can be wonderful and it can be awesome and heart breaking at the same time. I do not mean to make you think it is not great, but I just warn you to be careful, when the state is in your business all the time it is very hard. Things you think are "normal" they find abusive or violating of a childs rights.

Please feel free to PM me anytime you need to or if you have any questions.

Good Luck and thanks for being one of a few elite people who care that much about kids.

[icollectcokestuff]

Originally Posted by owutaqt

I have resisted this thread for awhile, as my husband and I had such a horrible time with this. We did adopt a girl two yrs ago after fostering her for almost four years, but it was so hard on all of us.

Try to not worry too much on the ethnic group of a child, our daughter is latino we are caucasian, never been an issue. Open your home to sibling groups that might include a girl, this can make placement easier.

Whatever you do please please please be careful with social workers, NEVER tell them anything that they do not need to know. Trust me I could write a book on the things that I did wrong but that was the one key thing that I wish I would have remembered. They will act like you are all on the same team, but trust me if they think even the slightest thing is off it will cause a lot of problems.

We were actually written up for child abuse because our foster daughter tried to throw a tv at me after she broke the window in her room, I placed the tv out the window to keep it away from her. We were told that we did not handle it right and that we should have taken the TV and sat on it to keep her safe.

It can be crazy, but it can be wonderful and it can be awesome and heart breaking at the same time. I do not mean to make you think it is not great, but I just warn you to be careful, when the state is in your business all the time it is very hard. Things you think are "normal" they find abusive or violating of a childs rights.

Please feel free to PM me anytime you need to or if you have any questions.

Good Luck and thanks for being one of a few elite people who care that much about kids.

THANK YOU for allowing me to see another side of it. This is definitely some advice that I will keep close to my heart!

[nanci143]

owutaqt---thank you for calling us the "elite" I really like that term!

[icollectcokestuff]

[icollectcokestuff]

Not to drag up an old post or anything....but would you believe that our home is still NOT open????

[sandalz4life]

Doesn't the waiting just SUCK!!!! It seemed like we did it forever and I just finally gave up, then a couple months later we had a boy from a friend of a friend type thing and now in 5 weeks the same thing will happen I do know that it takes forever to get anything out of the state

[yvonne grigsby]

Praying that the Lord will send you the little ones you need..Yvonne