Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Old 12-27-2008, 02:45 PM
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Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

My DD is 2 years 8 months. Her teacher at school insists that she be trained as most of the other children in her class are pottying on the potty. I set aside this week to be at home and try to train her. We go to the potty about every 1/2 hour or so. She sits on the potty, we read books, and nothing.

She holds it until nap time or night time when I put a pull up on her. I know this cannot be healthy. Today is only my second day to try. I did not put a pull up on her at nap time.

Any help will be appreciated.....
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Old 12-27-2008, 05:19 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Do you think she is ready? My son's school makes you be trained at 3. It sounds to me like the teacher just is tired of changing dipes. If you think she is ready I would not fool with dipes or pullups. Underwear and naked is the way to go for us. Make sure you get her to go pee before bedtime or nap. If a child wakes from naps and nighttime wet, it's a sign they are not ready and teacher needs to back off.
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Old 12-27-2008, 05:30 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Sounds like you are doing all that you can do. Do you ever sit on the toliet also and show her what she should be doing?

I would have to agree that it isn't healthy for her to hold it. Is that normal for her to only pee at night or during naps?

I'm guessing that maybe she is afraid. Have a favorite doll "sit" on the potty and "sneak" pee in there maybe? I did that with my DD.
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Old 12-27-2008, 05:31 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I agree the kid has to be ready for it physically and mentally. They will fight you the whole way if they are not ready for it. I think the teacher should understand this being she is a teacher of small children....
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Old 12-27-2008, 05:33 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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To me it doesnt sound like she is ready, I think she will do it when she is. I asked my doctor about starting with my daughter and she said that the average child isnt even ready to START until they are three. I was suprised as I thought kids start around18-24 months. Good luck!
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Old 12-30-2008, 01:16 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I agree with the others, she sounds like she may not be ready. I have just recently got my DS potty trained, he'll be 3 in Feb. I just put the potty in the living room one day & finally said if you have to pee, run to the potty. He kind of started doing it on his own. But believe me, I had to mop the floor several hundred times in getting to where we are now. Thank goodness for hardwoods.
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:24 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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My DD is 2 years 2 months old and when I first wanted to potty train her at 18 months she would sit on the potty for hours just looking at books, goofing off. This went on till he was right at 2, then she started going on the potty. And does great at home.
Her daycare also wants her potty trained, but I don't see any help from them. I send her in panties and she comes home in a diaper-not even a pull up that I sent. I guess she has an accident and they just give up. DD needs to be asked about every 30 min. to go and sometimes will tell me, but she's not totally trained yet. This is very frustrating. I even pulled her out for a wk. so we could get her out of diapers, and she did great, not one accident. But the very next day I sent her she came hom in a diaper.
I need help also.
Sorry so long..maybe this should be in gripes & groans too!!
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:53 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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My first two didn't get it until they turned 3. My third is 2 years 7 months and not trained yet. We have been trying but she isn't ready. I don't think it is unusual that your daughter isn't trained yet and I think her teacher needs to realize that.
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Old 12-30-2008, 02:57 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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There might be too much pressure comming from the teacher. If she is not ready, it won't work regardless of what the teacher thinks. All of my dd's weren't potty trained until they were 3. I had a preschool teacher humiliate my dd in front of everyone all because she didn't want to be bothered changing a pull up. Go with your gut and don't rush
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Old 12-30-2008, 03:14 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I only have boys and they didn't get it until they were 3. I have never heard of a teacher telling you to do it. I've heard of preschools not taking kids unless they were potty trained, but for the teacher to tell you seems unusual to me.

Are they going to kick her out if she doesn't start using the potty? That would be my only concern. Otherwise, just say that you're working on it and let your DD be in control. Because when you potty train, you have no control, only your kid does!

Good luck!
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Old 12-30-2008, 06:00 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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wanted to add an old saying: Start potty training a child at 2, they will be trained at 3. Start training a child at 3, they will be trained at 3

There are some early trainers, but at least among my sons friends the only one who was early trained was spanked when he had accidents so I don't consider her a success. I'd love it it these were wearly trainers though!
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Old 12-30-2008, 06:10 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Our DS is 3 now and when he was 2 1/2 he was almost potty trained and then he fell & got stiches and all of a sudden he didn't want anything to do with it so we let it go then he decided one day he want to go again so we started again.... Now we are back to trying to get him to go again
We will let him go naked & put him on the potty all the time & the moment you take him off he will pee right on the pursian rug so now the rug is pulled up and the hardwood floors are taking all the punishment!!!! Treats, stickers and so far nothing works...
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Old 01-04-2009, 05:51 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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THANKS so much!!! I really appreciate all of you input. I feel much better. After the third day of no accidents and no pee except at nap or bedtime, I decided that she is not ready. I do not want the potty to be a bad thing. I will talk to her teacher and let her know how I feel. She goes to a Montessori school and they have "their" way of doing many things. I take it under advisement but do not feel that they should control what I do as a Mom.

We will try again later. Thanks again for all of your advice.
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Old 01-04-2009, 06:17 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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This will be sure to make you feel glad you live in the US and can afford diapers!

Several years ago, I had a woman from Nepal working for me. She was a sweet as could be, and would often compare life here in the US to life in her village outside of Kathmandu. She has 2 sons - both teenagers. When I was attempting to potty train my son, she told me women in Nepal cannot and will not allow children to be in diapers beyond about 9 months old! Women simply do not have the time, money, or clean water to "waste" on washing diapers.

They hold their children over the chamber pot until they pee. They keep doing this until the baby associates being held bare butt in the air over the chamber pot with urinating. It can take weeks and weeks, but she told me both her children were "potty trained" and did not wet themselves after about 10-11 months of age!

Can you believe that???

I just had to share.
Clearly, your daughter isn't ready. Stand pleasant but firm with her teacher.
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Old 01-04-2009, 07:12 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Wow, maybe I'm the crazy one, but it sounds to me like she is ready. Holding it, is a sign she's ready to be potty trained. I'd give it longer than a day or 2 before putting the Pull Ups on her. Just my opinion though-all kids are different.
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Old 01-04-2009, 07:22 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I have the opposite feelings about potty training, I think the reason a lot of Mom's have so much trouble is because they wait too long. When I was a nanny the little girl I cared for was 2yrs 3 mo when I started and I wanted to train her right away. The parents wanted me to wait a little while so she wouldn't have the stress of a new nanny and potty training all at the same time. I started when she was 2.5 and put her on the potty every three hours. She never had an accident, the very first time though she was afraid to go on the potty and I had to wait until it was running down her leg and then put her on. She started crying and as soon as she started going on the potty she stopped and said "That didn't hurt." I guess she was afraid that it would be painful and that's why she didn't want to go. After that it was super easy.

Once they start going long periods between peeing their bodies are ready. You could try not forcing her but just asking her if she wants to go and make up a chart that she can put stickers on when she does go. That way it will be her idea when she wants to try and you could even give a small sticker just for trying or a big special sticker if she actually goes. Definitely try to make it fun and not like a punishment. If she isn't having accidents her body is definitely ready, you just have to find a way to convince her that it's a good thing.

If you haven't already, you could try getting her special big girl panties and tell her that she needs to keep them dry so that she doesn't pee on Dora or whatever her favorite character is. I wouldn't put pull ups on her at naptime because that only reinforces that she can wait until naptime to pee.

It is only more recently that children aren't being potty trained until 3. My siblings and I were all potty trained by two and it was stress free for my Mom. The other little one I nannied for was 2 when I trained her. She had a smaller bladder and I put her on the potty every hour to avoid accidents but she never fought it and she loved that she was a big girl.

You have to do whatever you feel is right for your little girl and the school has to accept that you are the parent and will make those decisions when you feel the time is right. At this age she should potty train really quickly once you get her interested in it.

Good luck!!
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Old 01-04-2009, 09:06 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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My DD is 35m is potty trained for the day. Still in pull ups at night. I started around 30m. It took a while. First she understood what the potty is for. Then saw me using it. Then I took her to potty every hour for about 2 weeks. and no I was not home all the time. When we went out I made sure to stop by the restroom before shopping or before we eat. I just kept asking her. She finally understood one day. But still choose to pee in her pull ups. But would tell me when she wants to poop. Usually its the other way around for kids.

I offered her a reward when she pee in the potty. DD likes muffins, cakes, cookies, and drinking juice. So I would offer her only those treats when she used the potty. She understood right away and it worked. I used the reward system for about 1 month and then I didn't need to any more. I only gave her small piece of the sweet and about 2oz of juice mix with water.

Most mornings her pull up is dry so dd uses the potty immediately when she wakes up.

Good luck with potty training.
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Old 01-04-2009, 09:10 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I don't think being dry all night is necessarily a sign of readiness. My first never wanted a bottle before bed, so he was dry all night at a very early age. My second wants a bottle immediately before bed, so he wakes up wet. For me, this particular sign has more to do with what they drank when, than readiness.

I Pm'd you. Good luck!
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Old 01-04-2009, 09:14 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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Gosh, I wish I had some advice for you! My boys were a breeze - thanks to Cheerios! They float, ya know... sprinkle a few Cheerios in the potty and it's time for target practice.

I have no girl tips, though sorry!
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Old 10-07-2011, 07:05 AM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I feel your pain. My little girl is almost 5 years old..she'll pee in the potty no problem but she absolutely REFUSES to poop in the potty. It's very frustrating.
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Old 10-08-2011, 04:39 PM

RE: Potty Training Advice--Expert Needed

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I feel really luck in that I didn't really train dd she trained herself by the time she was a little over 2. I had bought one of those little plastic potties when she was about 1 1/2. Just to have on hand and one day she didn't have a diaper on just free birding it and I say that look on her face, we were right next to the plastic potty so I put her on real quick and she went and just took it from there. I felt it was a little early so didnt push her but let her go when she wanted by the time she was 2 she only wore a diaper at night and to the store just to be safe and soon we didn't even need those precautions any more. Now DS is being rather stubborn about it but again he'll only be 2 in two weeks and I know he knows when he has to pee because he pulls off his diaper and goes on the floor ( thank goodness for tile floors ) I wish he would put the pieces together but for now I'm just trying to be patient.
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