[thebeaverclan]

This is sort of a rant LOL more or less something i found very funny tonight. I had posted earlier that i would get my fiances plate ready when he got home from work (something that i like doing) well tonight we had meatloaf, butter noodles (ds's request) and corn. I got his plate ready, heated it up, and put it on the table, he started eating and he said something about the noodles being "to dry" i just looked away with a pissed off look on my face. he looked at me and said "im just trying to tell you that they are dry" so i fired back at him "i really wish you'd quit your complaining about everything" (here's the funny part) he got up and goes "fine i won't eat" and threw his supper away only cuz i told him i wish he would quit his complaining LMAO. I'm sorry i find it very funny!!!

[FLcouponmom]

Wow! Sorry to hear this...I hope you work out your differences and feel better

[Nictehaa]

Not to be rude, but I don't find this to be funny at all. It borders on the lines of emotional abuse if you ask me. What an a@@! That is how he repays you for putting a warm plate of home-cooked food in front of him!?! My guess is that something else besides the dry pasta was bothering him that day.

[lalismommy83]

[joshmamabear]

I'm sorry to hear this, I thought it was going to get better after your "serious" talk to work it out (you mentioned it in your other rant). Hopefully, its just an outburst of emotions, both of you may just be tired and stressed. Today is another day to make it right

[RNSAMRN]

What would have been funny is if YOU were the one to throw his food away.

But seriously, that is a rather immature response on his part. Sounds like there are bigger issues going on then dry noodles. Hope you can communicate with each other to work things out.

[connie1615]

HHHMMM.....doesnt sound like what was bothering him was "dry noodles" something is going on...you need to really sit down and talk to him and work things out, ask him whats REALLY wrong. I would have been super mad if my hubby did that! Today there would be no dinner for him! LOL Hope you two can work it out!

[joshmamabear]

btw, there's cultures in Asia, like where I come from,

throwing good food is a BIG NO-NO; it puts a curse on the person that does it on purpose that will make his/her life so difficult he/she comes to a point he has nothing to eat. then, they will remember the food they threw away. it is like throwing a blessing away so (any form of) blessings run away from them.

just a trivia to share, back to OP's rant...

[ArwenEvenstar]

sounds like your husband was being an asshhhh...to throw away good food.... he could of eaten the rest and not the noodles...

[debbiepeter]

Well I guess he was hungry later. Sure hope you didnt cook him another meal

[Jakejake]

Originally Posted by Nictehaa

Not to be rude, but I don't find this to be funny at all. It borders on the lines of emotional abuse if you ask me. What an a@@! That is how he repays you for putting a warm plate of home-cooked food in front of him!?! My guess is that something else besides the dry pasta was bothering him that day.

I agree with this, it sounds like the relationship is dysfunctional at this point, and it would be a big warning sign to me if I were engaged to the person. These kinds of issues should be resolved before you move ahead in the relationship because (in my experience at least) we always hope these issues will get better once we're married but in reality they get more frequent and worse if they are there to start with.

[nowpoints]

I'm glad you have a group of women to vent to, and bounce ideas off of.

My Mother was Head of Human Resources of a large AeroSpace company in the 1960's during the Women's Equality Movement, and had all sorts of behaviors that came up with Men towards Women that she had to deal with.

I remember when I was young, she came home from work very upset once & she warned me:
"Whenever you are around something unhealthy or weird long enough, you get used to it.
Don't ever get used to anything that you feel is weird, it escalates."

[scottd09]

I think you guys might be overreacting. He just threw away a plate of food and she clearly isn't that upset about it. I'm sure they both will laugh about it one day if they aren't already.

My mother baked her boyfriend a cake for his birthday and he didn't want a piece right then. Well, she got mad and threw the cake at him while he was leaving. My mom always laughed about this afterwards. This was one of the funny memories we shared at her funeral. Everyone including her boyfriend laughed about it.

Some silly arguments are just silly arguments and nothing more. We all have them and we all laugh about them later.

[Blueangel1484]

Originally Posted by scottd09

I think you guys might be overreacting. He just threw away a plate of food and she clearly isn't that upset about it. I'm sure they both will laugh about it one day if they aren't already.

I think some posters reactions have more to do with a previous post the OP made along the same lines.

[Nictehaa]

Originally Posted by scottd09

I think you guys might be overreacting. He just threw away a plate of food and she clearly isn't that upset about it. I'm sure they both will laugh about it one day if they aren't already.

My mother baked her boyfriend a cake for his birthday and he didn't want a piece right then. Well, she got mad and threw the cake at him while he was leaving. My mom always laughed about this afterwards. This was one of the funny memories we shared at her funeral. Everyone including her boyfriend laughed about it.

Some silly arguments are just silly arguments and nothing more. We all have them and we all laugh about them later.

I must disagree that she isn't that upset about it. As a woman, I can clearly read between the lines that she is using humor as a defense. I may be wrong (it's happened once or twice before ;0p). I see his disrespect as a test. They are not married, and he is seeing what he can get away with. I would nip this in the bud ASAP if I were the OP. In his defense, perhaps he had something else on his mind that was bothering him, yet this still doesn't excuse his behavior. My hubby spent years working full time during the day, and full-time the same night, five nights a week. He would snap at everyone
as he got 1-2 sleep a day. I understood that he was extremely tired and irritable, but I explained to him that taking it out on his family was not the right way to handle it. We finally decided that for the sake of our relationship, he would need to quit his graveyard shift. It's been a struggle financially, but we both feel that it's done wonders for our family. Sorry for the long post, but my point is that she should sit down and talk to him about this and tell him how it made her feel.

[joshmamabear]

Originally Posted by scottd09

I think you guys might be overreacting. He just threw away a plate of food and she clearly isn't that upset about it. I'm sure they both will laugh about it one day if they aren't already.

My mother baked her boyfriend a cake for his birthday and he didn't want a piece right then. Well, she got mad and threw the cake at him while he was leaving. My mom always laughed about this afterwards. This was one of the funny memories we shared at her funeral. Everyone including her boyfriend laughed about it.

Some silly arguments are just silly arguments and nothing more. We all have them and we all laugh about them later.

You may have to read her other rant to understand where some of the replies are coming from. Disagreements are common in any HH but OP shared another story related to this.

[thebeaverclan]

i did share another story and we did talk it out, a few of you thought that he might ahve something else on his mind and he did, after i told him that i got a kick out of watching him throw a temper tantrum like a two year old, he told me that he was just stressed and he did say sorry to me, even tho that is still no excuse. I told him that was fine but i wasn't making him another supper and he simply replied ok. We've been together for almost three years so yeah the honeymoon stage is over and we're now living the ever day "real" life.

Scottd, i got a chuckle out of your comment about your mom throwing her boyfriends cake at him while he was leaving hehe.

You girls and guys are a great group to rant to gripe to blow off at, etc, and alot of you have made me really sit back and think about alot of things:-) i <3 you all!!

[brook6]

one day he'll be saying... 'I remember when you used to fix my plate for dinner'

and you'll be saying... 'yeah, I used to enjoy doing it and you used to appreciate it'

[TinaF68]

Be what it may, but I have to agree with the PP about nipping things in the bud. Having sadly experienced a failed marriage years ago, hindsight has taught me that you have to stand your ground on unacceptable behavior. None of us is a saint, but we all deserve to be treated with common courtesy and respect. He wouldn't have done that to his mom or an aunt or a neighbor - you deserve as much respect as they do.

[AngBuck]

I don't see it as "emotional" abuse. He said the noodles are dry . Who hasn't heard their SO complain about the hamburger being dry, or not tuna casserole again.. etc Men complain just as much as us women. Difference is they have no filter (hence the foot in mouth syndrome, or the phrase in the dog house). Should have slapped a pat of butter on the noodles, they'd be fine. He could have skipped the noodles, but he was being a smart a**.

You two will giggle about it in the morning. Lil spats are part of living together and marriage. Wait til he uses all the TP and doesn't put a new roll on DH does that all the time . He always says a witty remark that I usually start laughing.

[Nictehaa]

Originally Posted by AngBuck

I don't see it as "emotional" abuse. He said the noodles are dry . Who hasn't heard their SO complain about the hamburger being dry, or not tuna casserole again.. etc Men complain just as much as us women. Difference is they have no filter (hence the foot in mouth syndrome, or the phrase in the dog house). Should have slapped a pat of butter on the noodles, they'd be fine. He could have skipped the noodles, but he was being a smart a**.

You two will giggle about it in the morning. Lil spats are part of living together and marriage. Wait til he uses all the TP and doesn't put a new roll on DH does that all the time . He always says a witty remark that I usually start laughing.

I wasn't referring to his observation of the dry noodles being emotional abuse. I was referring to him throwing his food in the garbage. Even if the food was inedible, any respectful man would have still shown appreciation for the gesture. Him showing an absolute disregard for her feelings is a sign of a bigger issue, IMO.

[AngBuck]

Originally Posted by Nictehaa

I wasn't referring to his observation of the dry noodles being emotional abuse. I was referring to him throwing his food in the garbage. Even if the food was inedible, any respectful man would have still shown appreciation for the gesture. Him showing an absolute disregard for her feelings is a sign of a bigger issue, IMO.

The way I look at it is he can make his own plate. If he doesn't like what she cooks, than he can either make his own dinner, or starve. He wants to throw his plate away fine, peanut butter is in the cupboard.

If he wants to act like a toddler,then the next time I made his plate it would be Gerber Graduates and a sippy cup.

I don't see it as abusive. I see it as someone who is wanting to have a mommy instead of a wife. The OP needs to grow a back bone and let him know she's not going to put up with it.

[Nictehaa]

Originally Posted by AngBuck

The way I look at it is he can make his own plate. If he doesn't like what she cooks, than he can either make his own dinner, or starve. He wants to throw his plate away fine, peanut butter is in the cupboard.

If he wants to act like a toddler,then the next time I made his plate it would be Gerber Graduates and a sippy cup.

I don't see it as abusive. I see it as someone who is wanting to have a mommy instead of a wife. The OP needs to grow a back bone and let him know she's not going to put up with it.

Amen! And with coupons, she can get a great deal on sippy cups and Gerber Graduates! ;0p

[AngBuck]

Originally Posted by Nictehaa

Amen! And with coupons, she can get a great deal on sippy cups and Gerber Graduates! ;0p

[keoughrn]

There are times ( tonight) my husband will just walk out of the house if he doesn't like what I fix. He will go blow money on take out, he seems to eat out at least once a day. He has forced us in to bankruptcy and continues to shove over 5000 calories a day in to his 400 pound body that sits on his non showed reeking of body funk without a job self- now THAT is dysfunctional, rant all you want we will listen, but count your blessings too. It could bs worse.