Sick Of Beggars In Store Parking Lots!!!!

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Old 01-20-2012, 08:25 PM
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Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

My husband works very hard for the money he makes and I coupon and shop the deals to make that money stretch as far as possible. The Lord has been good and we always seem to have just enough for our needs. I do have a good heart and feel sorry for people down on their luck, but I don't like for them to accost me in grocery store parking lots asking for money. I guess the upside of that is that they do ask and are not pulling a knife or gun and demanding my purse, right? Still, I have felt very intimidated at times. There is one particular shopping area that I won't even go to anymore due to the number of beggars. One gal came up to me (while she is already holding 5 or 6 bags of stuff from the Dollar General) and give her sad tale about homelessness and having kids etc and wants me to give her money. This was just after I had been in the store to get one bottle of Dawn with a coupon and had to use coins to pay for the difference as I had no green folding money left for the week after paying bills! Another time some gal wanted $3 to buy pampers with....I told her she might want to look into getting cloth diapers! (yes, I know the start up cost of those is high, but you save tons of money in the long run!)..I told someone else about it and they said she could not buy pampers with $3 but that is the going rate for a rock of crack around here!
So many other times I have been bugged by folks but today was the last straw. I was around the side of Foodlion loading my groceries in the boot of my car (note to self: from now on park in front in view of the store windows) and this dude stops his car and rolls down the window and gives me a sob story about being on the way to pick up his kids and wanting money to feed them something. He was driving an almost new car and I drive one that is over 20 years old and can rarely fill the gas tank all the up! Why won't these folks stop being drawn to me like magnets?! I am probably poorer than some of them!!!

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Old 01-20-2012, 10:08 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I think that if you don't know their story, it's probably better to reserve judgement about them....it's kind of mean to assume that just because they're "beggars" that they must be going to use your three dollars for drugs. Maybe they coupon too, who knows?? But that's just my opinion...I know a guy who used to be top of his company, making soooo much money...and got laid off and after several months was to the point where he had to ask strangers for food.

You could always write down the name of some area resources, like a church or food pantry that helps out needy families, and give that information to them when they ask for money.
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Old 01-20-2012, 10:37 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I know how you feel. We can't even afford a car, I have to walk everywhere because even bus money is a sometimes a chore. Point is, I'll be walking along to or from the store and EVERY TIME someone asks me for money, food, cigs, etc..... We give what we can when we can, but being constantly asked for these things is a pain. I know several people that live where we do on foods stamps etc... because they have children, While I know that the kids need these things it does aggravate me to no end that these are the same people driving new cars, have big screen t.v.s (if it weren't for our landlord and it being included in the rent we wouldn't even have one), and then to see these same people asking me for things, it gets a little too much. and yes, I would have to say that MOST of the time, the money that they are asking for goes to drugs. Not just my opionon it is what I SEE everyday.
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Old 01-20-2012, 11:21 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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My husband got to the point when someone asks us for anything he says, "man, I was just about to ask you the same thing.". No matter where we go we are asked, There is not a thing of a quick run to Safeway or Walmart, Safeway has 2 homeless people one at each door begging and then people walking around the parking lot begging, you have to weave and wobble around them, then at Walmart not only the beggers you have the petition signers 3-5 at each door surrounding you almost cornering you. I understand times are hard right now, but come one now...
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Old 01-20-2012, 11:31 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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AMEN! I live in an area where NO ONE goes hungry. I spent almost 20 years in social services and when people beg for "food money" I direct them to our amazing soup kitchens and helpful programs that are right down the street.

I've been cussed out more times than I can count and I've seen our "beggars" surfing iphones and macbooks. I may not know their story, but I sure know ENOUGH.
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Old 01-20-2012, 11:49 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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Amen but what about beggars knockin at door (neighbors)this irrates me bad. This am the local everday beggar was knockin mind u its @like 8 am I kinda ignored the knock untill it was just persistant I open door yup I knew lisa do u have a cig I'm like u know its 8 am yea I figured u were up geesh not how I wanna start my day out we roll our own cigs buy a roller n get a bag of tobacco ...........
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:05 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I am sooo glad you posted this today. My dbf and I were at CVS today doing the coke/sprite/dr pepper deal. We bought about 50 of the 12 packs and we would take them to the car after every 8. So we were in the parking lot frequently. We had gotten a close spot but we could see the rest of the lot.
An older looking man was walking through the parking lot pushing his wife/girlfriend around in a wheelchair. We avoided them because it looked sketchy. So we got in line again at CVS and there were 2 girls behind us about our age (college aged). They were talking about the couple. One girl came in the store to buy stuff and the other sat in the car. The couple went to the girls car and knocked on her window until she rolled the window down!!!!!! They told her that they were in town for the girlfriend to have a medical procedure (there are a couple of big hospitals in the city) and that their wallet had been stolen or something. Anyway..they were at a hotel that charged $59 a night and they only have 20 something dollars. So they were asking the girl to pick up the rest of the tab. She told them that she didn't have her wallet with her and apologized. As soon as they turned to walk away she ran to CVS. She was really freaked out.
So dbf and I watched as they went around to people in the CVS parking lot and the bank parking lot right next to CVS. The CVS is kind of in a shopping center and the shopping center usually has a security guard so dbf (Mr Fix It) waited outside while I did the next couple of transactions. He eventually saw the security guy and called him over to tell him what was going on. The security guard told him that he had told the couple to leave that morning (this was around 4 in the afternoon). He had watched the couple for a while and said that people were giving them money nonstop! He said it was 100% a scam.
It really annoyed me because I was working my butt off doing zillions of transactions (for me, dbf, mom, and bf's mom) and getting deals and some people just want a hand out. But more than it irritated me, it made me feel unsafe. This CVS is a 24 hour but it gets sketchy after dark so I never go after dark without dbf. But I usually never think twice about stopping by during the day alone. It made me feel very uneasy and creeped out.
I don't really know if there is a law that says people can't beg or go around in a parking lot asking for money (maybe the no solicitation law would apply to these situations) but if it happens again and that little security guy is not around I will call the police. Thats what they are there for right? To insure the security of the citizens? And I DID NOT feel secure.

Sorry for turning this into a novel It has just REALLY been bothering me today!
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:10 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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Originally Posted by AmandaDavenport View Post
My husband got to the point when someone asks us for anything he says, "man, I was just about to ask you the same thing.". No matter where we go we are asked, There is not a thing of a quick run to Safeway or Walmart, Safeway has 2 homeless people one at each door begging and then people walking around the parking lot begging, you have to weave and wobble around them, then at Walmart not only the beggers you have the petition signers 3-5 at each door surrounding you almost cornering you. I understand times are hard right now, but come one now...
That is PRICELESS!
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:33 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I work in sales and they come in the office with all kinds of stories and it always involves kids, diapers, food for kids etc. I had one come in the office talking on the phone about a car accident his relative had been in acting all concerned. Gets off the phone and tells me he needs money for going to the hospital. Ya right... It is for crack or whatever drug they are in to and it is NOT mean to assume they want the money for drugs because that is exactly what they want it for. I really hate the one that tried to sell you a homemade cross which isn't worth a penny but using the cross to make it look like they are doing it for a good cause. Sorry I've seen too many things in my life to believe that one anymore.
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Old 01-21-2012, 01:46 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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They interviewed a guy here in town who stands on a busy street corner with a tall homemade cross. He makes about $400 in a 6 hour day! I live deep in the bible belt so people probably assume he's collecting for a church bc he's not shabby looking at all. He only "works" 2 days a week bc that "meets his needs"!!

He says Jesus told him his brethren will provide. And provide they have! Ugh...

I used to work in Philly and on certain streets you had to walk nearly in the street to keep the beggars from grabbing at you!

I've been couponing for 30+ years. I can't imagine ever shopping without them
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Old 01-21-2012, 02:25 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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funny the other day i was in cvs and this guy came up to me with this card and a key ring attached to it...the card saying he was deaf and would take any donation for the key chain...i spoke the words no thanks (giving it back to him) and continued to shop. he went to the cashier to ask her she said she didnt have any money but went to borrow a dollar from her mgr...the mgr told her that when the guy turned around to walk out the door to yell out "hey Sir you dropped your dollar" to see if he really is deaf??.....
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Old 01-21-2012, 08:39 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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Panhandling is not tolerated here. When I see it, I report it to store management and they send the panhandlers packing. One assistant manager refused to do so, so I talked to the manager the next day. As I watched him try to control his anger towards the AM, he promised to follow up.

I have done this at WAGS, WalMart, and Jewel, all with the same results.

I was on a police ride-along several years ago and one of the calls the officer responded to was about a panhandler. As we approached the store, the panhandler (who the cop recognized) was leaving. The cop said there is a city ordinance against panhandling, and it is not tolerated.
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Old 01-21-2012, 09:26 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I've gotten to where I feel this way about girl scouts/boy scouts accosting me outside stores to buy absolute crap that people shouldn't be putting in their bodies to begin with. They don't seem much different than panhandlers to me - except that they don't even make a pretense of actually being in need - it seems to be to fund "activities" (not needs) at my expense, and the expense of my health. I find it really offensive that people are using their kids to peddle junk food, and they're teaching their kids that that's somehow moral.
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Old 01-21-2012, 09:44 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I remember the first time I ever saw anyone like that.(20 yrs ago) I was going into pklot to park and saw a car loaded with household stuff, a man and two kids about 8,& 12yrs old. The boy held a sign up saying "we will work for food" I was shocked but would not give any money etc. I went in the store did my grocery shopping , with this family on my mind. I decided to pray about it I simply asked the Lord "if they are still out there when I am through I take it as a sign to help them. " my shopping takes almost two hours....when I came out ,they were still there. I pulled up alongside their car, told them I didn't have any work for them, but did hand the boy some money and told him 'I hoped that helped" The boy had such a shocked look on his face that when I got home and told DH I said I think they were honest....

Another time my sis,I and her kids were traveling ,stopped at a rst area. A family was ther, and the woman had wrote a sign on the mirror saying they were out of gas,no mney and the kids were hungry...well sis and I always have a cooler with lunch fixings etc. and soda, so since we had already eaten we looked the lady up and took her what we had...a few others were doing the same with snacks etc. I don't know if they ever got any money, but we didn't have any to give.

We never know for sure what goes on with people, but I cannot walk away from a child who may/or may not be hungry.

I never give to those passing out the card saying they are deaf... They do get an income check ea. month. I know that for a fact.
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Old 01-21-2012, 09:47 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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Whenever I get asked for money for food I hand them a business card for the local food bank. I keep them on hand. I tell them "This is where I go and they can help you too." I haven't had to go there in a while thankfully, but I still keep their business cards on hand for these events. I've gotten cussed out before, but I also go thanked by a few people who didn't know where to go.
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Old 01-21-2012, 09:51 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ballardb View Post
I am sooo glad you posted this today. My dbf and I were at CVS today doing the coke/sprite/dr pepper deal. We bought about 50 of the 12 packs and we would take them to the car after every 8. So we were in the parking lot frequently. We had gotten a close spot but we could see the rest of the lot.
An older looking man was walking through the parking lot pushing his wife/girlfriend around in a wheelchair. We avoided them because it looked sketchy. So we got in line again at CVS and there were 2 girls behind us about our age (college aged). They were talking about the couple. One girl came in the store to buy stuff and the other sat in the car. The couple went to the girls car and knocked on her window until she rolled the window down!!!!!! They told her that they were in town for the girlfriend to have a medical procedure (there are a couple of big hospitals in the city) and that their wallet had been stolen or something. Anyway..they were at a hotel that charged $59 a night and they only have 20 something dollars. So they were asking the girl to pick up the rest of the tab. She told them that she didn't have her wallet with her and apologized. As soon as they turned to walk away she ran to CVS. She was really freaked out.
So dbf and I watched as they went around to people in the CVS parking lot and the bank parking lot right next to CVS. The CVS is kind of in a shopping center and the shopping center usually has a security guard so dbf (Mr Fix It) waited outside while I did the next couple of transactions. He eventually saw the security guy and called him over to tell him what was going on. The security guard told him that he had told the couple to leave that morning (this was around 4 in the afternoon). He had watched the couple for a while and said that people were giving them money nonstop! He said it was 100% a scam.
It really annoyed me because I was working my butt off doing zillions of transactions (for me, dbf, mom, and bf's mom) and getting deals and some people just want a hand out. But more than it irritated me, it made me feel unsafe. This CVS is a 24 hour but it gets sketchy after dark so I never go after dark without dbf. But I usually never think twice about stopping by during the day alone. It made me feel very uneasy and creeped out.
I don't really know if there is a law that says people can't beg or go around in a parking lot asking for money (maybe the no solicitation law would apply to these situations) but if it happens again and that little security guy is not around I will call the police. Thats what they are there for right? To insure the security of the citizens? And I DID NOT feel secure.

Sorry for turning this into a novel It has just REALLY been bothering me today!
I knew a lady that would stand at the off ramp to the interstate, with a sign that said she was homeless. She would easily make $80-$100 in couple of hours. My hubby works at Labor Ready making minimum wage and it's just a tad iritating. Esp. since she wasn't homeless, but lived with a friend.
I actually went to most of the churches that I know, run charity programs and showed them a picture of her at home, (I knew her room-mate) and her begging.
I told them, it's up to them what they do with their resources, but they should at least be aware of the truth.
I also told her that I did that. She left town 2 weeks later.
I'm not saying that they're all like that. But if the person is legitimate, they will be grateful for a meal or to know where to go for their needs.

There are real people out there that do have needs.
I know, because 21 years ago, my mom called me and asked if I could go out to Vegas to live with her and help her out, because she had cancer. So, we loaded up our VW bus (yeah I had a hippie van) and drove across country. In Arkansas, we got into an accident (other driver's fault and she ran) nothing major but it messed up a wheel and the tire and caused us to have to spend extra time and $$ to replace them, which ran us short. We ended up the last leg of our journey getting gas vouchers to get from town to town. It was embarrasing but we had no money and my mom was sick.
So, just use better judgement I guess

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Old 01-21-2012, 09:58 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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DH and I had a discussion a long time ago about whether we should give to street beggars. We agreed we'd rather be on the side of giving to somebody who's going to use it for some stupid reason than on the side of turning our backs on someone who might be truly in need. That's just what our hearts tell us to do. Everybody else is free to follow his own conscience. If I don't have anything to spare, I can wish them peace and tell them I will pray for them.

I recently read a book titled, ,Girl's Guide to Homelessnessthat addresses the idea that people who are poor should not own things like phones or computers. The author details why they should not sell these for food. If you're interested, you can probably find the book in the public library.
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Old 01-21-2012, 10:40 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I loved the reply where the poster said her DH told folks that he was about to ask them the same thing! I might start using that one! Or, maybe I just pretend I don't hear them and go on about my business? Or can pull out my phone and say I am calling the cops?
A long time ago before the recent economic downturn I used to do a mystery shop at a fast food place in a bad section of town. Once a week for almost a year DH and I would go and have a free meal (I would get reimbursed up to a certain amount by the company) but I would never go alone. The beggars were worse than seagulls there back then, I cannot even imagine now! Know how if you toss one french fry out that a ton of seagulls would descend out of nowhere? Well, someone must have given somebody something there at one point as this seemed to be beggar central! You literally could not get from the car to the door and back again without getting solicited more than once! We would dine in and watch out the window as they would hassle other patrons! God help you if you went through the drive through as you would be trapped with cars in front and back as they went window to window! Once we had a woman there want a ride somewhere and before we could reply she was trying to open our back car door to get in!!!!!!
I am very leery about anyone approaching me in a parking lot even to ask for directions, especially when alone. I have had to ask for directions before but I only ask if there is a man and woman or two women or whatever so as not to make them feel uneasy even with a woman asking. These days you don't know what folks are going to do!
I guess why I am so leery about getting approached by anyone is that a few years back there was a carjacking at a CVS just a couple of blocks down from that fast food place. A young air force guy and his wife and baby were just passing through town on their way back to base from vacation and had stopped at CVS. The husband went inside and the wife stayed outside to change the baby's diaper. She wound up getting carjacked at gunpoint. The guy who already had 58 charges against him in the past and still walking the street, made her withdraw money at the ATM (as it turns out he needed drug money, surprise, surprise!) and then took her out to a rural area and raped her and then beat her to death. The baby was left laying in a field to die on a 100 degree day! Luckily later that day a man was out with his dog in that area and the dog found the badly dehydrated and sunburned baby. The baby lived, thank goodness! But I always think about that whenever I go to that store or have folks accost me!
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Old 01-21-2012, 10:42 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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There was a Walgreens that had some homeless people around. We have never lived in a large town so we don't see a lot of beggars. I was only approached once and asked for food. All I had was diapers and spaghetti sauce and I didn't want to give him money so I gave him some coupons for free fries from the Burger King next door.
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Old 01-21-2012, 10:48 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I give what I can. Sometimes I actually have food in the car and no cash which they've gladly accepted. Once I gave a man $5 and before I could even get my car loaded he'd already come out with a can of beer. Truly, it doesn't bother me, I reserve judgement and like to think I'm helping someone.

It is scary in parking lots, though, especially at night. That scares me. You just shouldn't approach women in parking lots.
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Old 01-21-2012, 11:05 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I was at a mall and a guy came up to me handing me a key chain saying he is deaf.... Well, guess what... I have a deaf son so I know sign language......I started signing to him...of course he didn't know sign so he started walking away...I followed him telling people he was trying to scam NOT to give him money as he wasn't deaf....in the end he was running down the mall to get away from me....It is those people that give the deaf a bad name!!! My son is deaf but he works,(very hard), has a family, has a new home, and is a productive citizen..Do not give to those people! They probably aren't deaf but even if the are, they can get a job like the rest of us....deaf doesn't mean you don't have to work!!!!!!!! The problem is the government makes it easier for them to sit on their fat butts and NOT work...makes me so angry.....

Sometimes it can be scarey when a begger comes up onto you in the parking lot so be very careful...I had one guy corner me between my door...I couldn't move as he was blocking me. I was scared...a guy pulling into the parking lot saw what was happening and he pull up and stopped behind my car and rolled down his window and the guy took off....thank you God! Be careful.... you never know if they want money or you....
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Old 01-21-2012, 11:53 AM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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It is so difficult to tell who is in need and who is a scam. In the past I have bought sandwiches for those who were begging outside a store and have gotten some pretty ungrateful responses. Once I bought a guy with a dog a 5 pound of dog food so the poor animal wouldn't be hungry. BUT, there are a number of people with signs asking to feed their kids who hang around Walmart, Kmart etc and they infuriate me. If they really needed food for children there are a lot of resources.The part that makes me angriest is that I see the same people, same signs at different locations and there for the past year or more.
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:27 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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The panhandlers got so bad here (mostly Home Depot parking lot and the main intersections off the freeway) that they made it illegal to do it. Now they all have folding signs and only open them when the light is red or there are no police around.

I have offered gas to someone that needed money for a tank of gas to get home to their dying mother. Nope, didn't want it. They wanted the money. I have given food from Chick fil A to one person standing on the corner right next to it begging for food and they threw it away right in front of us. I offered a bag of fruit and fresh breads from the farmers market to another they turned me down and yelled at me damning me to hell for not giving them money instead.

My daughter goes every other weekend at 6am to a local shelter to help feed the homeless. They make breakfast tacos for them. I have gotten to a point where I direct people to this shelter and tell them as long as they are free of drugs and alcohol, they will gladly feed them and leave it at that.
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:39 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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I am sick of them too, I usto give them money all the time I felt sorry for them till one guy came up to me and told me a sob story that his wife forgot to give him gas money and his car ran out of gas and he forgot his credit card at home he asked for $5 to get gas so I gave it to him then a few days later the same jerk came up to me at the gas station and told me the same lie! I was so mad , now I am very picky who I will give $ too. I always give money to people with dogs this summer there was a man and a woman that had 4 pitt bulls and it was hot out . I love pitt bulls I have 2 myself so I gave him $25 and a whole case of water that I just bought at wallmart so the dogs had water . Then I thought of my babies at home laying on the couch with in the aircon on. My mom was with me and mad that I gave them so much money but she knows I will do anything for owners of pittbulls.
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Old 01-21-2012, 12:40 PM

RE: Sick of beggars in store parking lots!!!!

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My and my family don't mind giving to people on the street if they are honest. For ex. My dad one time gave a man $5 because the man walked up to the truck mind you and told my dad he had drank so much and he wanted money for a beer to cure his hangover. So my dad was like ok. I was like what?! My dad said I'd rather someone tell me the truth then make up a phony story.
My husband has bought food for a prego lady too. He got kinda p'd off though because she was being picky. He walked with her to mcds and bought her a meal and she still wanted ice cream and cookies! He told her your baby doesn't need ice cream and cookies she was so grateful though everyone at mcds was looking at him like he was crazy.
I've offered to buy people food with the signs saying need money for food and get cussed out I'm like guess your not that hungry then . Pan handlers are not tolerated here where I live the cops pick them up and take them in. So I haven't seem as many as before which is a good thing when shopping at the mall. Felt like they were everywhere!
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