[gidget0949]

get out of this arrangement ASAP, like right now. tell the mom that you just can not do it. no other explantaion needed. would hate to see you pulled over and ticketed for a broken car seat. guess who would end up on the short end.

[jjsbev]

OK - I need an update! Have you called and told that you can NOT watch the child tomorrow? BE STRONG AND FIRM!!!
I know it's hard to say no sometimes but in this case you really need to be firm and JUST SAY NO!!

[Coupon-Nut]

OMG this is just crazy .

There is no way in the world I would ask or let someone I just met watch my daughter and she just turned 19 , now my 4 year old is a different story (kidding - even though some days I really wish I could return him - nephew but he is family and I still love him much)

This mother is not responsible , it shows in the car seat not to mention leaving such a young child with someone she just met , offering to pay and not showing up with the money. People who are not responsible for their own actions have a way of making everyone else responsible (setting blame) for whatever happens . You could end up way over head in legal trouble because of this nut and there really is a whole lot of nuts out there.

Do yourself and your children a favor and tell her that you are sorry but you can not keep doing this .

[timmsa]

I would just tell that you can't do it.
And I learned a hard lesson just recently, last year i started watching someone's children that my hubby works with. Well from the very start, he could not pay me for the whole month, something about they went on vacation and spent to much. So I let it go, and then more and more happened, then it went from part time to full time(this guy got full custody of the kids), any ways i never did get all the back money he owes. So I will never watch anyone children friends or not.

But you just met this woman and she has a broken car seat, honestly i would just tell her you can do it anymore. that you have your hands full right now.

[mommyof1beauty]

Originally Posted by jjsbev

OK - I need an update! Have you called and told that you can NOT watch the child tomorrow? BE STRONG AND FIRM!!!
I know it's hard to say no sometimes but in this case you really need to be firm and JUST SAY NO!!

Yes - I called her at 7 and told her "Sorry I can't watch your DD tomorrow.. too much for me right now, you can't pay me until next week, and you gave me to her with a broken carseat. I drive my DD to daycare every day, and have to take DS to the doc, and I can't be liable for a ticket or getting in an accident with your daughter's broken carseat...."

Her reponse (earlier in the day) to the broke carseat was "oh well it's not a huge deal....we dont drive far to go anywhere" - are you freaking kidding me? FAR OR NOT my kids are always buckled in! You can't pay me until next week???? Come on! You know you can't take her to a daycare and expect them to "let you off" payment for 5 days.....

Just unbelievable. Someone posted earlier "dont judge this lady" - I'm not. We're not. But come on - Mom has a NEW car with tags on still "Altima" - obviously she had money to buy a car but not a car seat? Yesterday I noticed her toes all done, not by herself - flowers on her toes, well money for a pedi?? I'm sorry..priorities in the wrong places. I'm a nice person who will do alot to help folks out but does not mean I want to be taken advantage of, nor does it make it "ok" for you to ride around in the car with your kids unbuckled.

[AndieMcNeil]

I am a lawyer and though it isn't lawyerly at all- my guts are screaming run run run...

[esquala]

That poor little girl. I hope her grandmother can come through for her, because it sounds like her very own mom has her priorities in all the wrong places. No wonder she misbehaves.

You did the right thing pulling out of this situation, though. You cannot help this child. You can only take care of your own family right now, esp with a newborn.

[sar1]

I agree w/everyone else saying to get out now. But my side note to this - I have seen like 4 kids in the past 2 months not in car seats or in an unbuckled car seat while driving around. What?!?! They were definitely of the age and size to be in one. The last one I saw was about a 2-3 year old in the middle of the backseat between 2 adults. She was in a carseat but while I was stopped next to their car at a light I saw her lean all the way over to grab something and her straps were just loose and unbuckled. I know some kids can undo their own buckles, but there were 2 adults in the backseat with her and no one cared. Another story - I used to commute past a hospital in Baltimore and I'd sit in traffic near this hospital for quite a while sometimes. I saw people leaving the hospital w/their babies (newborns are my guess) and holding them in the front seat in their arms. I thought all hospitals were supposed to check that you had a carseat before you left!

[LindseyLouXOX]

OMG!!! I would NOT be watching this kid. Your DD may like her, but this arrangement is a huge no go for me. No wonder she was so friendly at first, trying to line up a daycare!

[flower_mom]

Originally Posted by sar1

I agree w/everyone else saying to get out now. But my side note to this - I have seen like 4 kids in the past 2 months not in car seats or in an unbuckled car seat while driving around. What?!?! They were definitely of the age and size to be in one. The last one I saw was about a 2-3 year old in the middle of the backseat between 2 adults. She was in a carseat but while I was stopped next to their car at a light I saw her lean all the way over to grab something and her straps were just loose and unbuckled. I know some kids can undo their own buckles, but there were 2 adults in the backseat with her and no one cared. Another story - I used to commute past a hospital in Baltimore and I'd sit in traffic near this hospital for quite a while sometimes. I saw people leaving the hospital w/their babies (newborns are my guess) and holding them in the front seat in their arms. I thought all hospitals were supposed to check that you had a carseat before you left!

Don't get me started on carseats and people not buckling in their children. I see kids all the time not buckled correctly, wrong type of carseat, or Nothing AT ALL! At times, I wonder how many people get pulled over in a day and given tickets. I'd love to be the carseat police and just set these people straight sometimes! This is probably harsh, but I feel if you get pulled over with your child in no carseat, the child should not be able to leave with you until there is an appropriate carseat for the child to sit in.
About a week ago, I was sitting in traffic when an older lady just fell out of the passenger side of her truck. When I went over to help, there was a 2-3 year old boy that had gotten out of the open door of the truck standing on the railing of the overpass...Scared me to death, so I picked him up and was holding him. Long story short, the lady decided she wanted no medical attention (gosh, she had hit her head on the cement), the husband/grandfather grabbed the boy and just put him in the middle of the front seat of the truck. Evidently the boy had been riding there...They didn't even have regular seatbelts to strap in...I just felt like I should call and report them or something...My heart was breaking for that boy.
I'm a little carseat safety nut, though. I have my DD's in 5 point harnesses until they are 80-100 lbs and wish they made rear facing seats for kids larger than 20 lbs. My youngest is ~ 30 lbs. and still rear facing (and, yes, she has plenty of room for her legs and feet, still)

I'm glad that you got this settled and can focus on your kids, now. Live and learn...Don't be such a sucker next time...

[hotmama111]

Don't put yourself out right now. You have a 5 1/2 month old that needs your full attention. Just say NO!!!

[KimsDD]

I don't have children, but I have seen this enough in my mother's case: Her sister consistently drops off her son [my mother's nephew] for whole weekend, or on days, or he'll bike over. Sometimes his clothes aren't clean, most of the time he hasn't eaten, etc. It is a pure scam. I think that people like the lady you are dealing with and my mothers sister prey on kind people. Growing up and seeing my mother be overly nice [not a bad trait whatsoever, except when you are taken advantage of] made me be not nice enough sometimes as a result due to fear of being taken advantage of. I am not sure what advice to give, except that if it's harmful to your newborn, your nerves, or your sleeping health, then this lady should probably find another babysitter. I hope this helps a little bit!

[KimsDD]

Completely agree. She did get lucky that time, but who knows what COULD have happened!!!

[KimsDD]

Good job! You don't need the stress and flat-out PANIC of driving with a broken car seat AND someone else's child! I'm stressed even thinking of it!

[kimmyann123]

aww jess...good advice...

[vhermetz]

Yikes!! RUN the other way!! This will NOT end here.....she will take advantage of you in every way!

[esquala]

Originally Posted by mommyof1beauty

Two hours after I got home, the lady called me - wanted me to watch her DD for the rest of the week while she was working....something about her mom can't watch the girl b/c she went to Sedona.

That smells like 3-day old fish right there. Who waits til the last second to make child care arrangements when they know they have to be at work? What would she have done with her baby had you not been available?

[JaimeDae]

I agree get out of this situation now. It's very odd that she would ask you to take this on not even knowing you.

[Justlooking1208]

Glad you got out of this situation. Let's just hope you get your money. If not, it was a lesson learned.

[kristinamarie76]

I agree this lady is wacky. I can understand her despiration for a sitter though. I'm new to my area and dont know anyone. HOWEVER, I would ask is you knew of anyone who could babysit, a reference!
I understand some people are more lax on safety than others, I try not to judge. But when you're with caring for someone else's child, you becom liable and that's a whole new ball game!!
I would definately say that you have to focus on your NB. If you feel guilty, offer the name and number of someone that might be able to watch her child.

[poshpoodle]

WOW! This just made me sick- what did she say to you when you told her you could not do it anymore- was she upset, annoyed...how did she respond? I think you did the right thing!My MIL use to watch kids- it is classic for people to say they will pay next week- then the next week would come and the child and parent would never show up again- so she ended up watching the kid for free! GOod luck- not even sure if I could be friends that puts her pedicures before the safety of her child- JMHO

[scamelo]

OMG I can't believe that mother. I thought I had seen it all when years ago ( like 10)my mom was sitting on a mall bench by the bathrooms and a woman sitting next to her asked her to watch her baby while she used the bathroom. My mom was shocked. of course my mom is not a baby snatcher, but who in their right mind would do this

Something very wrong here, I would not watch this girl again.

Are you sure she is the mother???

[mommyof1beauty]

Originally Posted by poshpoodle

WOW! This just made me sick- what did she say to you when you told her you could not do it anymore- was she upset, annoyed...how did she respond? I think you did the right thing!My MIL use to watch kids- it is classic for people to say they will pay next week- then the next week would come and the child and parent would never show up again- so she ended up watching the kid for free! GOod luck- not even sure if I could be friends that puts her pedicures before the safety of her child- JMHO

After watching her ONE day (Wed.) - the mom came to get the girl at 4:45. At that point was ready for this kid to go elsewhere. I was changing NB in the bedroom, came out to see this girl IN MY FREEZER.....holy hell, I was like "get your hands OUT of my freezer... right NOW!" But I want, I want I want, I said "NO, nothing, you get nothing. Sorry."

The mom came, and the girl was jumping from sofa to sofa, my DD said "dont jump on furniture, my mommy will get mad" this girl kept doing it, and her mom said nothing?!

Anyways, I dont know this lady - other than she was at the library for the brief time I was there. I found it odd that I took DD to McD's and they showed up.....very odd. Gut told me it was bad.

After they left, I was overwhelmed. House a disaster, dishes unwashed, baby who needed to be fed, DD who was tired from this girl waking her up...I could scream. DH came home, and asked how it went (surprisingly, he never asks about anything) and he said "who cares, just watch her. We have 2 extra carseats, use one, give it to her mom."

First, it's not my job to meddle in and GIVE one of my carseats to them. Second I wanted to smack him! I was like "who cares?? And I'm driving DD to school tomorrow, someone hits me, and girls get hurt and all you can say is who cares?"

So when I called her, she was smart with me "well, THANKS anyways. I just find it rude that you can't watch her."

I was po'd! Excuse you? You find it rude that I can't watch her, but you can't pay me? Let me tell YOU something: I FIND IT RUDE that you dont pay, AND that you expect me to drive her around in a BROKEN carseat. Sorry, find another person. Dont give me the pity card."

That was it - she hung up.

Lesson learned, I wont watch any kids but my own! My daughter went to bed last night and said "mamma, I dont like that girl, she was not nice to me."

[Vegas1]

Anyone that is uncomfortable watching another child should not do it. Whether it be because of the child or the parent. It just makes for unhappy all around. I am a daycare provider and have had a lot of difficult children that have adjusted just fine after they have been here for a while (parents are another story). Let's face it some people are very different. I know, I've seen it time and time again. I do it for the children who usually just need guidance and security. But this is a hard job and not for everyone. Watching children that are not your own is definitely different than watching your own. Just tell her you cannot do it and that will be that. Good luck!

[scamelo]

I am still wondering if this was the actual mother. I must be watching too much TV, with all the child abductions, talking today about the jaycee dugard case etc. I can't imagine anyone leaving their only child with a total stranger ( nothing personal). Your husband could be a child molester or serial killer for all she knows, she would have no idea.

OK, going to far but still wondering with broken car seat and all, is this really her child?