[KellyMarie]

I want to start this thread by groaning loudly...cannot find just the exact smiley to express my feelings, so I am just going to do my best with words. As it has been stated so many times before, we strive to keep AFC friendly. I know we all have bad days and I know we all have our own opinions and I know we all like to add to posts. I cannot write how many times I have read something and the first thing that comes to my mind is a curse word or a not so nice thought...BUT I refrain from posting it!!!! I see more and more offensive material popping up at AFC. The forum leaders and mods are working much harder than they need to be trying to keep up with posts. Some examples of things this week that have been dealt with were trolling, racially offensive jokes, members calling each other out and some really offensive posts about common people in general. One I take very personally is whenever someone calls all cashiers in general dumb, slow, uneducated, or plain lazy. I would like to point out that I was a cashier for 11 years. I liked the job, I liked dealing with people on a daily basis and the hours and schedules were perfect for me...it's hard to have a "Real Job" as many of you prefer to call, when you have 4 teenaged children, 2 ailing parents and a farm to run with a husband that works out of town. I am using the "dumb , lazy, ignorant, uneducated" cashiers remarks as an example because I know how it offends me and I have seen many references here at AFC that could offend so many other large groups of members.
Please try to pay attention to what you post, please try to stay friendly, and remember to play nice. We should not have to go around editing and deleting rude and unkind remarks, everyone is an adult here with feelings, try to imagine how easily your feelings could be hurt by a "harmless" post.
And although I hate to post this, I will.....if a member is asked to be a little more considerate and we have to continue editing or deleting their posts, I will be more than happy to just ban them and be done with it. Enough is enough!

If you see an offensive remark, hit the report button and let the team deal with it. Please do not post a rude comment back.

Editing to add:

Treat one another at AFC with respect, keep your rude comments to yourselves, quit taking on gang mentalities and calling out other members because you do not agree with their shopping practices.

[LyndaSLP]

Yea...what she said!

[Faith]

[AngieP]

great post KellyMarie!

I'd like to comment on the cashier issue~~In addition to my college educated background and my full time professional career, I have a part time job at a retail store and I often play the roll as cashier to fill in for our regularly scheduled cashiers and let me tell you, we're not dumb. We have the ability to deal with people of every angle~~rude, nice, dishonest, smelly, loud, obnoxious, unpleasant, demanding~(you know why type of shopper you are)~~~you name it, we deal with it. So, the next time you check out with a cashier just take a minute and say ~~ it would be much appreciated and you might feel a little better too!

Oh~~and one more thing~~put down your cell phones when you're being checked out!!!!!!!!

[CM_ANGEL]

Also, please don't look down on each other in the whole Stay at Home Mom vs. Working Mom issue. I see alot of that on here and I know that it offends many people including myself. Not all moms are able to stay home yet not everyone wants their children to be in daycare. It is a 2-way street and we need to be careful of each other's feelings.

I think it was KMChamplin who said it best...when you feel the need to go off on someone, type it out, read it back as a complete stranger would be reading it, then edit.

[LyndaSLP]

Originally Posted by CM_ANGEL

I think it was KMChamplin who said it best...when you feel the need to go off on someone, type it out, read it back as a complete stranger would be reading it, then edit.

Or as I sometimes do: ".......then delete"

[geishagirl81]

Yes I get irratated by the generalization that cashiers are dumb. I was in retail while in college for the 3 degrees I have earned. And when I feel ready to go out and get a part-time job, I would not bat an eye to get another job in retail.

[sherilynne]

OOPS Thanks for the reminder.. I love AFC and sure dont want to get the boot.....

I go by the If I would not say it to GOD dont say it to anyone else...

[darlingsta]

I think we should try to follow "if you can't say anything nice"....

[adnil]

I am going to QUOTE myself here if you all don't mind:

To Start with, I know that there is a post here on AFC somewhere that say's pretty much the same thing that I'm about to say.

If for any reason you have a problem with a post that you have read and would like to make a comment to the OP it would probably be best to go ahead and do what I call the (7 STEP RULE)

1~ TYPE it out
2~ Hit the Preview Post tab
3~ Walk away from the computer for a while
4~ Come back sit down and READ what you have written
5~ Think about what you just read (Is this really what you want to say?)
6~ Consider the other persons FEELINGS (Will this be something that will hurt the other person?)
7~ Would you want this wrote to or about you?

It is all a matter of common courtesy, When writing something here on AFC you are not just reflecting on yourself but others as well. This is one of the BIGGEST family sites there is on the net, And yes there will be times that someone will post something that you or someone else doe's not agree with, BUT that doesn't mean that everybody is in DISAGEEMENT with it.

There are no two (2) people that have the same thought's on one subject.

FOR EXAMPLE:
I may say that the grass in my yard is half Brown at the moment, and Kelly may say that it is half Green.

[latrice0723]

I totally agree
We all need to mindful of others feelings when we post
What may seem innocent and harmless to use may not be that way to others
Something to keep in the back of our minds when posting:
If you wouldn't allow your children to say it to another person then it may not be appropriate for you to say it either

[joshmamabear]

I understand sometimes in our frustration with cashiers, we call them names but just think

does it make them dumb/stupid because you didn't get what you want? and they're nice if they play along and do as you wish? I know for a fact some are working their way through college and will one day attain higher education than I have.

just some thoughts to think about next time when we generalize cashiers as dumb and stupid.

[Carina]

While I agree that we should not lump every cashier together, we have all experienced the good, the bad and the ugly. It all comes down to how the company trains their employees and how knowledgeable they become of the store's rules, etc. Kudos to anyone who works in retail. Its not the easiest job in the world. Been there done that for five years to get through college and I stayed an extra year because I worked on commission and the money was awesome at the time. Dealing with people is an art that should not be looked down upon.

[bclarkcaldwell]

Just wanted to say I agree! We should be more considerate to others and just to what is going on at the moment....

[katjim00]

Just remember too.... Most of the times that we complain it is about the store policy and the cashier is the one who has to do their part to enforce it. It is not a rule they made up.....

And thank you for the reminder KellyMarie! We do all need this sometimes

[KellyMarie]

I would like to point out that although everyone's comments are very thoughtful and nice, that I used the remarks towards cashiers as just one example of many posts. I really intended for my point to be that AFC is a large community with very many active members and that we need to remember to take that into consideration with all of our posts, not just the ones about cashiers. It great to have fun, I posted a comment about men in general this morning in another thread, but it was in jest and I made that clear, I would hate to know that I offended our male following. I read my post before hitting the submit button just to make sure...that was more my point, please keep the entire AFC community in mind We have a great place here, I like knowing it's my home, we have great members and it's nice to know that when the real world gets a little tough you can come here and find some relief.

[marbear]

And can we are thinking someone did something we feel is unethical but are not sure because it was not clearly worded in the post (like say they used a TON of coupons you KNOW to be peelies but did not specifically say in the post that they took them off products they did not buy or something like that), can we please be kind and ask for clarification before blasting like we are holier than thou? By "ask for clarification", I do not mean in a dramatic "are you telling me you did !?!?!?!?" way ?

[Cheri]

Thank goodness for the edit button. I went back and read something I posted and decided it was not at all what I intended.
Thanks for the reminder.
Cheri

[lwilsonide]

I am a newer member and know that I come to AFC at times to vent and seek advice as sometimes it is hard to deal with what life throws at ya! However, we should all think of not only the support & guidance AFC provides, but also the help in saving money and allow us all to lead whatever roles we have. I would hate for things to change at AFC becasue people can't play nice. I stopped reading some parent magazines becasue I am soo tired of reading what the experts think is right. AFC is real with real people and real life experiences. Aside from all the things the mods have said to do when psoting think about what u would do w/o AFC! So please work extra hard at helping the mods keep AFC a happy medium for all!

[leahkw]

Can you imagine what the cashiers are saying about their rude nasty customers? LOL
I hope I didn't say anything to offend. Thanks for the update, Kel

[lhart24]

Thanks for the reminder.. I will try to play nice.. though I think I skipped that day of kindergarten...

I too however, worked in retail... But I think my orneriness kept it fun for me.. Even when I had the grouch of a customer come through.. oh the stories I could tell on that one.. HAHA

Thanks again for the reminder..

[bclarkcaldwell]

all in all, lets count our blessings!!!!!!!!

[Carina]

My two most favorite customers where:

1) little old man that made the cashier void the whole order then he wanted his shoes re-rung so that the .10 cents in the price adjustment would be on his bill. The cashier tried to give him .10 cents out of her own pocket but he insisted it had to be totally re-done.

2) Lady who found an old pair of baby shoes in brown and put them in a box of the store I was working at and INSISTED we HAD to take the shoes back. I said, "Madam, we have never ever sold brown baby shoes." Her reply, "You obviously don't know your stock." I worked in the shoe department for 5 years, I surely knew my stock so I sent her upstairs to talk to the store manager who called us and we insisted those shoes came from then Thom McCain (sp??) (who used to have their own stores). Anywoo, she walked away and got nothing, she was just trying to scam us.

[LauraO]

Thanks KellyMarie. I went back and edited one of my posts also.

...and....about the language that is being used on AFC.... I posted the word, "shpit" once.... (as in, "shpit happens"). Does this count as a "bad" word? I've noticed there are all kinds of abbreviations, bleeps and alternate spelling for bad words. If even alluding to a bad word is not allowed, I think we are going to all need a language etiquette lesson in a new post.

Also, I've seen plenty of male bashing here. (Mostly joking, but I think it could be a complete turnoff to the few male members that we have). Just imagine yourself on a male-dominated site where they complain about their wives/girlfriends. I certainly wouldn't feel comfortable there!

[Chesney]

Many moons ago while holding Parent-Teacher Conferences for my Kindergarten students it "DAWNED ON ME" WHY little Susie always looked at the floor when answering my questions.
WHY little Johnny couldn't learn his ABC's.

It had [u]nothing to do with Susie or Johnny's ABILITIES[u], but the CIRCUMSTANCES they were living in.
Susie witnessed her father verbally abusing her mother every time she gave her opinion. SO NATURALLY SUSIE WAS HESITANT TO TALK TO TEACHER.
I couldn't concentrate on my ABC's if I had been little Johnny, their home had no heat and very little food.
We need to close our mouths and OPEN OUR HEARTS AND MINDS TO OUR NEIGHBORS, I think we would be shocked what we would hear and see. I AM TALKING TO MYSELF MOST OF ALL.
None of us know what the "other person" is going through